Dear Elim Grace,

It’s a Marriage Monday!

Like any healthy living thing, a marriage intends to grow and to thrive. But also like any healthy living thing, obstacles can get in the way of a thriving marriage. 

In the poetic book of Song of Solomon, these obstacles are described as “the little foxes that spoil the vineyard” (Song of Solomon 2:15) They are “threats” to the blossoming relationship. 

It occurs to me that when we think of “the little foxes” we both easily and quickly think of the bad things that could infiltrate, harm, spoil, even destroy a marriage. 

Yet, it also occurs to me that “the little foxes” could also be the good things. When life is good, do we let our good habits slide? When our finances are stable, do we stop talking regularly about our plans? When our work is prospering, do we recognize we’re spending less time together? 

Or when the kids are excelling, are we overlooking the affection we shared between us daily? When life is busy and we’re excited by it, do we stop cultivating intimacy and romance? When we’re helping friends and serving strangers, do we forget to confide in each other our own fears and joys? 

These good things are not bad things in and of themselves. A good life, stable finances, work that brings joy, children that exceed our expectations, a full schedule, a life of service and sacrifice — these are blessings! But do these good things have the potential to become or to let in “the little foxes”? The little threats and obstacles that might slip by us unnoticed into the vineyard of our relationship as husband and wife?

A marriage will both endure and enjoy different seasons of life. And in each season “the little foxes” may be different. May we be aware, look out for them, and at all costs protect and cherish the vineyard of our marriage.

Pastor Jonathan